la vie triste

Oh-
Can you believe it's been so long? Amazing, isn't it. i know we said we'd keep in touch but it just hasn't worked out too well. $.37 is hard to scrape up sometimes. Pride is even harder to scrape by. You know how i feel about shoes. You know even better how I feel about pride.

I'm still angry. you've left me all alone without a thought and probably not a prayer. ironic, isn't it? We were always at church. We didn't listen much but we were there. you'd think after 16 years, a boy and some distance wouldn't matter so much. Not after all we've done. But in everything one of us has left. And one of us has continued on. So i guess it makes sense one of us has left again. There's no more hiding in closets to keep from being separated. We didn't even seem to care at all. you never wanted to come to Athens and you'll certainly nevre come here, and you probably woulnd't notice if I came there. It's a sign of the times.

But I'm still angry. And I still have my pride. Acknowledging my presence when I'm in front of you means nothing to me. It's when there's some time and space that it counts. I've figured out, over this past year, who it is that really cared. And i've figure out even more these past two weeks who cared the most. You know how I feel about these sorts of things. It's takes attention. It's takes a few minutes on your cell phone. My gosh it takes a note on a website. You know what I need to feel secure. You know that I'm demanding and self-centered. You know my temper too. And i guess you know I'll see you some Sunday when I'm back in Birmingham. What's a few years and a boy, anyways?

love
lindsey